I Can Make This Promise

Fireworks are banned in my neighborhood. There are too many trees, too many houses. So this year for the Fourth of July, my parents are taking me to the Tulalip reservation, about twenty miles north of the city. They sell all kinds of fireworks, and they have a huge field where you can set them off. This place is crowded and colorful and chaotic. It’s amazing.

My parents lead the way to the booths. There’s a food truck parked beside the big gravel lot, selling authentic Mexican tacos. The smell of cooked, seasoned meat fills the air, mixing with the peppery gunpowder from all the fireworks. I can practically feel it, in little flecks of grime all over my skin. Mom asks, “Do you need these, Edie?” She opens her palm, revealing a little package of earplugs. I shake my head. “I’m okay, thanks.”
The booths are set up in several rows. The nearest one is decorated with red, white, and blue streamers, and a huge banner that shouts “FIREWORKS” in bold letters. The booth across from it is lime green, with little alien heads and UFOS outlined all over it in black paint. Another is hot pink, with candy-colored rockets arranged in bouquets on its counter. The next is blue, with the Seattle Seahawks logo stenciled in stark white and silver, plus the number 12; the 1 is shaped like the Space Needle.

I like this graffiti. I like the bright colors, the bold lines. I wonder if they created drawings and stencils first, or if they just grabbed their cans of spray paint and improvised. I also wonder if they keep sketchbooks, or have favorite places to draw, like I do. I’m always curious about other artists and their habits, their unfinished drafts, their inspirations. As we keep moving, I can’t help but drink it all in. I’ve never been to a reservation before. Each person I make eye contact with feels significant. It’s possible some of them are distant relatives. I could be walking past cousins or aunties right now, and I wouldn’t even know it.

A rock-and-roll version of “The Star-Spangled Banner” starts blaring out of nowhere, and I glance around myself, trying to find the speakers. But as the loud electric guitar mimics the sounds of “O say, can you see?” I instead notice a food vendor with signs that say they have traditional Native American fry bread. I stop and stare. The line is huge. The menu is handwritten on a whiteboard. An ice-filled cooler contains sodas and bottled lemonades. There are two open counters-one where you pay, one where you wait for your order. I watch as a girl receives her food. The fry bread is a rumpled, golden-brown disk, served on a paper plate. It almost looks like an elephant ear.

As the guitar transitions to a choppy “What so proudly we hailed-” something knocks into the backs of my legs. I stumble and turn around. A dog peers up at me with watery, bloodshot eyes. He’s panting hard, and his fur is mangy, but he looks happy. Surprisingly calm. I thought all dogs hated fireworks, but he doesn’t seem to mind the noise, the chaos. He just looks a little lost. I extend my hand to him. “Hi, puppy.” He lifts his big nose. Sniffs my fingers. Pushes his snout against my palm. His tail wags ferociously as he inches closer. “That’s a good boy,” I say. “You’re a good boy.” I check his neck, but he isn’t wearing a collar.

I glance around. Cash registers chime, and shouts of laughter are eclipsed by a huge boom. Shoes crunch across the gravel. A group of men walk by in mismatched basketball jerseys. A teenager adjusts her sunglasses; her colorful, beaded bracelets slide down her brown forearm. A guy with two long, dark braids is wearing a Batman tank top. A toddler is mid-meltdown, hands clamped over her ears, face crumpled as she cries out. “Poor thing,” I murmur. I stroke the dog’s head, distracted. “Where’s your owner?”

The rock-and-roll version of “The Star-Spangled Banner” is no longer recognizable. The guitar riffs have dissolved into wails. It doesn’t sound like “O’er the ramparts we watched.” It doesn’t sound like anything. Just crashing notes and frantic energy. I turn in the other direction, and an older woman catches my gaze and holds it. She’s seated on a stool at the edge of the crowd. Her T-shirt bears the message “Find Our Missing Girls.” Huh. I wonder what that’s about.

“Edie?” Mom’s voice cuts in through the blaring guitar and blasting fireworks. “What are you doing?” She places her hand on my shoulder and gently steers me away. “Honey, you can’t pet random dogs like that. It’s not safe. Look at how big he is. He might hurt you.” Dad’s behind her. “Your mother’s right. I know he’s cute, but you need to be careful.” “But he’s alone,” I say. “Shouldn’t we help him find his way home?” “Someone will come along for him,” Mom says, and I can barely hear her as the guitar screeches. “Don’t worry.” She tugs me away, but I look back. The dog sits in the middle of the walkway. His ears perk up, and his tongue lolls out of the corner of his mouth as he watches me leave.

We stop at a booth called the Big Bang. The words are spelled out in a swollen graffiti font. The letters are big and puffy and white, and they remind me of squished marshmallows. A brown-skinned teenager stands behind the counter. He’s wearing a white tank top, and has a little barbell pierced through his eyebrow. He grins, as if he’s genuinely happy to see us. “Afternoon, folks.” He flicks his chin up in greeting. “How’s it going?”

Dad nods in response. “We’re doing well, thank you.” A short silence follows as we look around his booth. The top shelf holds the biggest boxes, encased in glossy wrappers. Their labels alternate between sounding patriotic and menacing: “Rocket’s Red Glare.” “American Outlaw.” “Rolling Thunder.” “Sabotage.” The lower shelves contain smaller boxes and open trays of fireworks. “Where you guys from?” he asks. “We live in Seattle,” Mom answers. “Ah.” He nods, understanding. “That urban life. You like it out there?” Mom smiles. “Most of the time.” “Good, good. Glad to hear.” He drums his hands on the countertop. “So what kinds of fireworks are you looking for?” “I know we want some sparklers, some Roman candles. Maybe a fountain or two?”

“All right.” He turns to his lowest shelf and grabs two trays, tilting them forward to reveal their contents. “I have these two kinds,” he says. One tray is filled with bundles of slender gray brown sticks. The other has bundles of hot pink sparklers; the top half of each one is wrapped in dyed magenta-yellow-teal tissue paper and laced with a gold ribbon.

We pick the pretty ones, then select some Roman candles and two stubby fountains. The boy places a long cardboard box on the counter before us and starts piling our stuff inside it. “Anything else?” Both my parents look at me. And the boy does, too. I feel heat rise in my cheeks. I go rigid under their scrutiny. “Edie?” Mom asks. Her voice is gentle, a half whisper at most. I glance at the shelves and shrug, feeling awkward. I wish she wouldn’t have said anything. I hate being put on the spot in front of strangers. The boy snaps his fingers. “Here,” he says. “How ’bout this?” He crouches behind the counter. I can hear the scrape of crates sliding across the ground. He straightens back up and stands directly across from me, smiling. “Ever seen one of these before?” He holds up a cylinder, wrapped in a turquoise label. It has a black platform on one end. Its fuse pops out the top like a little red tongue. I shake my head. “Really?” He sets it down on the counter. Taps it with his finger. “That’s too bad,” he says. “These guys are my favorites, out of everything I’ve got here. That’s why I keep ’em hidden. They’re reserved for special people.” He winks, and now I’m certain my face is all red and splotchy. “What is it?” I mumble, hoping he’ll stop looking at me. He slides the firework across the counter. “A gift,” he says. “A surprise.” I inspect the wrapper, hesitating. “Go on,” he urges. “Take it.” I accept the firework and hold it close against my chest. “Thank you,” Mom says, her voice brimming with gratitude. She retrieves her wallet from the depths of her purse. “How much do I owe you?” “Twenty-four fifty.” Dad hoists the box into his arms and frowns. “That’s a bit low, isn’t it?” “It’s all good.” The boy inclines his head toward me. “Little sister’s is on the house.” My parents protest. They want to pay him the full amount, but he waves their offer away. He says, “Don’t worry about it. Just take care of yourselves out there.” And he sounds like he really means it.